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February 06, 2011

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Comments

T Braun

Interesting comments Mr. Wolfe. However, the comment "if you're a woman..." drastically weakened the credibility of your point. Most of the men I know have parents too, and are as responsible as caring for them as women. In fact, as in our household, we've reached the point where my wife is taking care of her parents and I of mine. We are 40 somethings, not in our 60's and 70's. Unacceptable generalization.

David Wolfe

Mr. Braun,your comment on its face is fairly taken. Nevertheless, my statement that began, "if you are a woman..." was not meant to slight men who have care giving responsibilities. I was merely recognizing the fact that at age 70 women outnumber men by about 73 men to every 100 women. This means that at age 70 women greatly outnumber men in both total number of caregivers and care recipients. Also, studies sponsored by Metropolitan Life have found that aside from absolute numbers, the percentage of the female population that serves as caregivers is significantly higher the percentage of the male population that provides caregiving.

Also, the "for example" posture of my statement does not mean it is a generalization. It was simply an "as if" statement.

Actuarially you are significantly less likely to be performing caregiving duties at age 70 than you wife at the same age.

Thanks for your comment

DBW

joared

I look forward to eventually reading Jacoby's book. I certainly agree our culture needs to explore aging realistically. I think promoting "eternal youth" products is insulting to many aging individuals intelligence.

AARP really misses the boat on this topic. Oprah Winfrey and The Doctors could do a much better job on the natural aging subject, too.

Also, I cringe when I see hair dye TV ads for men, including the one with two little girls pushing such hair treatment on their Dad so he can attract a new mother for them, I suppose. Let's get him some of that temporary aging spot removal and wrinkle eraser creme he can start using for the rest of his life. I don't see anything cute about any of it at all. Aren't there more important things in life on which to expend time and money?

Jeff Madsen

My Grandma used to tell me, despite her generally upbeat and positive outlook on life, that "growing old is not for the faint-hearted". How refreshing to have someone take a balanced, non-insulting look at the issues of growing older and caregiving. All of our friends are in the midst of caregiving for their parents - my wife and I are about five to ten years behind them. The issues are real and sometimes stark. The hucksters do a disservice to themselves and everyone involved, from those directly affected to loved ones and friends.

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